Brenda was a beautiful and kind soul, reserved
and quiet, and extremely hard to anger. She was one
of those very rare people that actually lived for
the moment as she used to say that the previous day
you cannot change as it has passed, and the future
you have no control over, so she lived for the moment.
That is a very hard lesson of life to learn.
After a few years of being together I asked her
where did she get the capacity of hers to have
a ready smile or laugh so easily. She told me that
living for the moment helps and also that it is
useless to be worried or angry, as life is to short.
She loved collecting rocks and sea shells and has
always somehow been connected to the stars in the
night sky. We would walk along the inlet shores hand
in hand on a summer's night and she would always
be looking at the ground to spot that special rock
or shell.
I had the very rare privilage to be able to talk
to her on several occasions before she passed on
and she wanted very much for this to be read out
loud at this service.
To my darling Heather.
I cherished bringing you into this world and at the first sight of you I loved
you with all my heart. I want you to know that I will be looking out for
you and if and when you need to talk, I will listen. I have always held you
tight in my heart and am so sorry for all this strife in your life since
last May. You are my most treasured accomplishment in my whole life and if
anything would let me walk that left fork in my road of life, then without
doubt it was you. You are growing into a very special young lady and over
this last few months, you may not have known it but I used to look at you
when you were not watching, and tell dad, you are special to me, and my biggest
dissapointment in my life is I will not be there for all the special days
coming up in your life. Light that candle for me, for you, and for your dad.
I will be there.
Bren had an amazing philosophy that a person goes
through their life and when they pass away they come
to a fork in their road. If you have not completed
what you need to do in your life then you take the
right fork and come back as a totally new person
to try again. If you have completed all you need
to do and have lived your life correctly, you take
the left fork and go on to all your family, friends
and pets, waiting for you to live in the spiritual
plane where there is nothing but love and peace.
Bren has often told me she believes that she was
a cowboy in a previous life and this next fork she
will come back as an astronaut because she loves
the stars.
Bren has also asked if anything was said about her
life then to talk about Egmont as she dearly loved
this place.
We met in 1980 and moved down to Burnaby for a short
time, then took on a project in a place called Egmont
on the Sunshine coast. This project was a very old
house needing repairs, situated on 4 acres right
on the inlet with it's own bay. It had no power,
no telephone, boat access only across the inlet and
haul your own water from the well. Brenda loved this
place. She enjoyed clearing an old overgrown garden
and clearing out the huge amount of vines along the
front, and when the tide was out, digging for clams
in the bay. This actually was the only source of
income and we had to go out at all hours of the day
or night when the tide was out to dig clams, She
never complained.
I remember we had dug out our bay of clams and had
to go to different beaches and bays by boat. On the
way back from a bay, Bren was seated at the front
of the boat and I was at the stern running the engine
when I noticed there was quite a lot of water at
my feet. I asked Bren to check the boat up front
and sure enough she found a crack in the bottom of
the boat and water was coming in. Keep in mind that
this is in the dead of night about 3 miles from home
down the inlet with about 400lbs of clams on board.
I suggested we sling out the clams and then I could
go a little faster to lift the bow out of the water
where the leak was. Brenda being the woman she was,
said not likely, after so much work all night, and
calm cool and collected, wrapped a rope around her
waist, tied to the bow so she would have something
to pull on and stuck her foot hard down on the crack,
we made it home safely.
While we were there my brother Dereck came to visit
us from England and to him it has always been a source
of amusement and wonder at who Brenda was, with her
easy laugh and fast smile. My brother and I went
fishing for salmon in the boat one night around 10pm.
It was a beautiful summer's night , stars were out,
and we were sitting out from the bay about 300 yards
just talking when Dereck said he smelt fresh baked
bread, then out of the dark in the small dinghy came
Brenda with hot freshly baked rolls from the woodstove.
My brother said he will always remember this and
he will always remember Brenda.
One of her favorite passtimes while in this house
was to sit together on the deck, hand in hand with
me, cup of coffee in her other hand and look at the
stars.
Well Bren, I believe because you were such a very
special selfless soul, you did complete your walk
of life on this earth, and you took the left fork,
because of all the people you touched with kindness
and a smile, you are truly at peace.
You were without doubt the most selfless, calm collected
person, and I thank God with all my heart for the
23 years he gave us together, without even a raised
voice or argument and I thank you my Brenda for the
love, friendship and trust and what you gave me and
Heather, you made us the happiest people in the world
every day. |
